Me & My Responsibilities

A few months ago, my nephew and niece got promoted to the next class after somehow managing to get through their final term exams. The joy of leveling up to a higher class was clearly visible on their faces but that glow multiplied even further when their new set of books of the next class came home. The fragrance and shine of the new books was making them so fascinated and delighted that even I could relate to their emotions when I was at school. That is probably the only time phase in the year when a student is glancing at his books with so much enthusiasm and excitement. I am still not able to figure out what is this spell that the new school books are able to cast on to the kids for so many generations that they don’t get tired of flipping over its pages and staring on to the book cover with so much intensity specifically on the day these are purchased. And  how I can forget about the joy of covering the books and note books with a brown paper. The scenario at home almost becomes like there is a small production line set up in a room with all the tools put together including scissors, tape and glue. And then there is the cherry on the top with a favorite cartoon sticker placed on the notebook of your most favorite subject (Favorite subject = the subject in which you somehow gets a comparatively better score than the rest of the subjects). When I was getting nostalgic with all the memories of my childhood, I just felt that those times were really fun when responsibilities were tiny and limited to packing your bag everyday, completing your homework and getting decent scores in tests and exams.

During childhood, we were bounded by restrictions and were allowed to play only in our safe zones as these restrictions were imposed on to us by our adults. Though at the same time we also had the tendency to imagine if we can grow at a faster rate so that we can do certain things at our own will, can wake up late night and won’t have take permission from our adults. I too showed the symptoms of this behavior when I was a kid and was desperately waiting to grow up so that I could try out certain things that I have only seen in movies and television. Times changed and that day did came when I turned into a teenager. All the fantasies during my childhood about the life of a teenager did appear to be luring for a while such as going for late night movies, riding a cool bike, traveling on a vacation, partying with friends every weekend and going for a date with the one you love. However, one fact that went discarded from my fantasies was that all of it requires money to get accomplished. Parents were able to manage enough for my college education and could further afford only a small portion for my pocket money. So in order to fulfill my remaining desires, I got a sense of realization to work even harder to get a decent job with good salary package in future.

Times changed further, and here I was working in a reputed organization and getting a handsome monthly salary. I felt possibly this is the time when I am earning for myself and won’t have to depend on anyone to fulfill my desires. I was taking the pride of spending my money on my food and drinks as it was the result of my 30 days of hard work. But then I got a reality check that I also need to plan my income and focus on investing my money rather than merely spending it on other fun stuffs. I started getting loads of advice from those who called the so-called experienced in life that I would be getting married in a few years from now and its important to have a sufficient bank balance to find a good girl. And then I would be starting my family so I again need to plan for the education of my future kids. I was like hold on. All this while I was waiting to reach a certain age so that I can be free from any boundation or restriction without realizing there were multiple stacks of responsibilities that have also been piling up all this time.

Many famous authors have claimed that Life is like a complicated game. The more you try to decode it; the lesser you will be able to get it. But the strange thing about a human mind is that it will always try to indulge in those activities which are beyond its thinking capabilities. I wondered why is it that I am getting overpowered by my responsibilities. Why is it that I cannot stay one step ahead of them to lead a life the way I want. Why I am always feeling suppressed by the possibilities of the future outcomes and let them take over my present. After giving a thought for a while, I realized that this is how things are meant to be. After all, Responsibilities have not grown along with my age but they have always been there waiting for me to first acquire the ability to handle those with dignity and grace. Probably I need to handle all of my responsibilities just like the way I did while covering school books with brown paper during childhood with joy and happiness without feeling the burden of it. Probably that is the best way to deal with it.

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